Archive for February, 2016

Synchronicity

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Is it me or does there seem to be a lot of buzz around the concept of “synchronicity” lately?

Coined by the late Carl Jung, the term refers to concept of an outward occurrence coinciding with one’s internal state of being with no causal relationship. I find myself experiencing synchronicity in regards to my experiences of synchronicity! And I find if this is an experience I am having, there are inevitably numerous others with similar occurrences happening in their lives.

Today I had a wild energetic alignment around the idea of baby steps towards growth and setting intentions, healthy patterns of behavior, and creating positive future memories. I know, POSITIVE FUTURE MEMORIES, pretty fantastic idea, right?!!! This idea was introduced to me by a recent trainer, a strategy employed in therapy to begin to create and then reinforce positive possibilities in your brain.

In the car as I drove to my office, listening to story on personal finances, something I rarely spend my energy learning or paying attention to, I was struck by the similarities between the teachings of this financial guru and those taught in the many lenses of strength based psychological treatment. While I did not catch the name of this financial guru, I am grateful for the synchronistic universal reinforcement of these new concepts into my life.

Here are the tenets that keep showing up regarding building a healthy future; I am hopeful you have the opportunity to gain and discuss these tenets as well:

  1. Small Consistent Steps – long term growth in whatever arena of live is best done in small steps rather than leaps and bounds. Consistent small steps towards positive change is bound to create growth over the long term.
  2. Positive Future Memories – Set intentions towards a positive future memory. Keeping your focus in the present on decision making that will lead towards positive change in the long term is key. Every moment can contribute to overall good health, whether it is physical, emotional, career, or financial health.
  3. Confidence – confidence is only built by repeated experiences of success. You have to gain knowledge and learn in order to be successful. Be curious, educate yourself, so that you can build the confidence you need to take steps towards growth.
  4. Front Loading – Long term success often involves a difficult period of front-loading. You have to put in the work in the beginning to reap the benefits. Expect and appreciate your hard work in the beginning part of any process. There is always a learning curve.
  5. Process Over Product – and finally, enjoy the process. No matter how difficult it is, you will gain more from enjoying the process, the ups and the downs, rather than agonizing over perceived losses or downs. After all, we are only guaranteed the present moment. Building attachments to outcome can potentially lead to great disappointment and losing sight of the gifts you have in the now.

What ideas and signs have been showing up for you lately?

How does synchronicity expressed itself in your life?

To welcoming synchronicity,

Kim Ottinger

To schedule a free 20 minute phone consult with Kim for art therapy, talk therapy, or sensoriotor therapy or to explore change and synchronicity in Washington, DC, email her at kim@yoursoultherapy.com

STEPPING OUT OF THE STORY

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I know my old story.

It is :: I AM BROKEN.

And even before that it is :: I AM NOT WORTHY.

The stigma of having been divorced, the first of my friends and in my age group to do so, often bites at my heals, begging for me to pick it up and ride the downward spiral of WHAT IFs and SHOULDS. 

What if I tried harder to make the relationship work?
What if I wasn’t tolerant enough of my husband’s behavior?
What if I had staged an intervention?

I should have been able to see it sooner and leave…I wasted so many years.

I should have known, as a therapist, what my husband’s issues and my issues were.

I should have been able to help myself.

I should be married with children now.

And then the WHYs come parading into my brain in an endless stream of existential confusion.

Why have I been given this life?
Why must I go through these trials?
Why can’t I have the family I dreamed of as a child?
Why do they teach us fairy tales as children if that is not the script of reality?
Why didn’t anyone see what was wrong and tell me to leave the relationship?
Why can’t I get it right?

How long have I held this belief of unworthiness? Where did it start? Why is it so hard to shake?

I get lost in the story and forget to breathe. I look at the clock and I see how much precious time I have wasted trying to figure out an answer to the uncertainty of life. The unsolvable.

Then I melt into the embrace of unknowing and uncertainty, gratitude towards my path, trusting that I am headed in the direction I am supposed to be going. The anxiety and groundlessness ends as I sink into my feet, allowing the energy to disperse throughout my limbs and trunk, loosening my grip physically and mentally. I take a few moments to notice the peace I am currently surrounded by, the smell, the image, the sounds. I send an energetic bow of thanks to the universe for giving me the journey I am on, appreciating the highs and lows, the experience as a whole.

To say it no longer hits me would be a lie. I can, with strong conviction, assert that it hits me much less often and for short increments of time before I identify it, kiss it, and say goodbye. I trust my path. Only with time and practice have I learned to tune into this power, my power, my own intuition drawn from my feminine divine energy. 

I invite you to tune into your feminine divine energy to step out of your story when you can. To end the cycle of rumination over the unsolvable and unknowable and instead to tune into and be grateful for what you have now.

To tuning into the Divine Feminine in you, me & us,

Kim Ottinger

To schedule a free 20 minute consultation for art therapy, talk therapy or sensorimotor psychotherapy to begin the process stepping out of the story, email kim@yoursoultherapy.com

Energy Warps

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Time is the only commodity at which I consistently grasp for. No matter how enlightened I am feeling, I still feel the nagging pull of precious time and the seconds passing before my eyes. As I fight for time to slow and bargain to fit in just a few more things before my heavy eyelids close involuntarily, I have yet to learn the secret to controlling time.

Today, I witnessed in full awareness as I entered a threshold and shortly after exited an energy warp where my soul was deeply met and felt in a psychospiritual way. No matter which lens I view this the words are not quite there to describe it.

Energy flew around in my mind and body as if unconstrained by my self-limiting structural beliefs or rigid goal focused thinking. Creativity bounced through my entire being and time did not hold me back. I made connections and conclusions on an intuitive and cognitive level at a speed exponentially faster than normal.  I have felt this before, though not with the same clarity or awareness as with this experience.

Curiously, I examined the trigger or source of this wonderful experience. Several precursors were in place: a weekend of learning and growing, self-care, and positive energy connections. I spent this past weekend learning a new way of working, in awe of the incredible experiences of the trainer and my cohort. Learning, growing, making new neural pathways. Additionally, I work hard to take care of my mind, body, and spirit.

And in the moment leading up to my energy warp, I was impacted, felt moved by and then resonated with the positive inertia of my client’s energy. She reveled in the progress she was making, and we celebrated her experience. We shared the savoring of her experience, enjoying the joy and exploring the new space it opened in her heart, her new free flowing energy.

The concoction of these three conditions consistently brought me into this state through the threshold into an energy warp, a period of soul enlightenment.

I invite you to walk with me and inviting this concoction into your own life. 

What is your experience of energy warps, spiritual states or similar experiences?

What precursors and conditions encourage this joyful and enlightening type of experience for you?

In exploring the expansive connected energy in you and me,

Kim Ottinger

Connect with me for a free 20 minute phone consultation for art therapy, psychotherapy, and/or sensorimotor psychotherapy by emailing me at kim@yoursoultherapy.com

Waiting…

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Sometimes I forget this little nugget of wisdom.

And every single time I encounter it again it feels like a slap in the face.

The moment of shame passes as I notice the possible suffering I could put myself through by focusing on what I did not do right. And as I step out of the sticky grasping hands of shame, I lift my head up in gratitude to the universal energy that granted me this wisdom once again. Thankful for the chance to let go of another layer of limitation I have subconsciously placed on myself.

I wait.

I wait to feel happy.

One day I will have a family, then I can be happy. One day I will have the finances to feel secure and stable, then I can be happy. One day I will be turning away business, and then I can be happy. One day I will be able to completely trust my partner, and then I will be happy. One day I will reach this goal, one day I will reach that achievement.

 

One day, one day, one day.

 

This timeline for happiness exists subconsciously in my mind. Waiting for a future date before it can be released. Because I am a work in progress I cannot be fully happy today.

 

And then I snap out of it.

 

Today! Today I will be content with who I am and where I am headed no matter the future. I unleash my full potential for contentment, love, happiness, release of fears, and I embrace the uncertainty of now. I will not wait until that magical date in the future when I have achieved that goal. I have the gift of this present moment and I will live in it fully, imperfectly, no matter the outcome.

What are your magical timelines for happiness?

When will you allow yourself to enjoy the present?

To snapping out of it,

Kim

If you would like to release the waiting, email me at kim@yoursoultherapy.com to schedule a free 20 minute phone consult.